When life feels painful, we want change; often folks hire me hoping I will change their feelings, behaviors, and thoughts. They want me to eradicate pain by helping them become more of what they believe they should be: less needy, less afraid, less sad, thinner, happier, more social, more acceptable according to their judging minds.
But judgment does not realize self-love, and behaviors that do not reflect self-love do not move us toward wellbeing.
When you work with me, we will work together to support you in making changes that are based in self-acceptance. This kind of change unfolds in a natural and easeful way, from a part of you that is not driven by exacting expectations.
Self-acceptance is an important part of experiencing yourself differently and it is a fundamental component of mindfulness. Self-acceptance is a byproduct of mindfulness practice.
A mediation teacher and researcher, John Kabat-Zinn defines mindfulness as “paying attention in a particular way; on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally.”
Another way to describe mindfulness is the practice of noticing, just noticing. Nothing to change. Nothing to fix. Mindfulness is the process of aligning yourself with unconditional acceptance. You might notice judgment and then return to noticing breathing. In the process of repeatedly moving your attention away from judging toward resting in being, you grow your experience of being with what is as it is; you grow your experience of acceptance.
I can be contacted at 415-336-5343. You may also reach me from the contact form. (Therapy patients, please note all HIPAA Compliant communications should be done through the phone number listed above.)